So it's finally come to this

So it has finally happened. I told him that I'm leaving. I have to say that if someone had told me at the beginning that I would be the one to say goodbye, I would have thought they were stark raving mad. But here we are.

It seems like a pretty unique circumstance for a divorce. We aren't fighting, and we get along wonderfully. We both love each other very much, and have never had any trouble in the bedroom department. But we could never be truly happy together.

It goes beyond being polar opposites, it's about wanting different things out of life and having different priorities. The life that would bring him happiness would stifle me, and the life that would bring me happiness would bore him to death. The solutions would be for either one of us to give up everything that mattered to their happiness for the other persons dream, or for both parties to live in an uneasy compromise, where neither one of us gets what we want.

So here comes my solution. We go back to being friends. If you are the least bit familiar with the story of my marriage then you know that it has been closer to a friendship than a marriage in the first place. By staying friends, we won't have to lose each other, we can go on loving each other and providing support. I just won't live with him anymore. This will allow both of us to focus on what we really want out of life and fulfill our totally different dreams while still having the other person in our lives.

For me that means finally starting school ( I never thought it would be put off this long) and learning how to put myself first and stand up for my needs and wants. They are just as important as anyone else's.

He is handling it the best that can be expected. I never thought I would hurt him, but I think deep down he has recognized that my decision is the best choice for both of us in the long run, even if it seems so difficult now.

I'm leaving him with just about everything. Only taking my personal belongings. He can keep the house, the furniture, the bank account. I'm trying to make this as easy on him as possible. All I want now is freedom.